Dealing with bereavement is not easy by any means and can be even harder when it’s a young child.
Bereavement is not just about losing a loved one like a son, daughter, partner, mum or dad or any other relation, it affects greatly also when it’s a pet.
Living alone and owning a pet is particularly difficult, your pet does truly become your best friend, when you have had that pet for 10, 15 or even 20 years it’s a huge blow when they sadly pass away.
It doesn’t matter if it’s a friend or loved one, or a pet, losing someone can be an extremely emotional time, we all experience grief differently, it becomes an emotional roller coaster ride as we feel different emotions and physical emotions.
The loss of a loved one, creates many different types of emotions, as you go through the loss stages of handling the sudden loss, from stress, to loneliness, anxiety to panic attacks. All these symptoms are common, while you try to come to terms with the loss you’ve suffered.
Sometimes when someone is ill before the bereavement happens it allows you to prepare mentally for the loss allowing you to try to come to terms about this bereavement.
Certain situations can trigger upset like birthdays, anniversaries, watching your children grow up, perhaps watching grandchildren come into this world or other special occasions like events that mean a great deal or a holiday destination.
Some of the feelings people who are going through bereavement may feel
It’s a very confusing time with emotions at an all-time high, best policy is to Listen, Help and Chat.
This site has some great help suggestions for anyone suffering with the loss of a loved one, contact them today Cruse Bereavement Care.
Some common areas of what to do when someone is grieving to help them.
- Keep in touch with them by any means even if it means calling them on the phone or visiting in person, emails, texts, social media, even a write a letter and sending it in the post.
- You need to understand that everyone grieves in different ways, so people will react in different ways to grieving.
- Try not to use words like ‘I understand how your feeling’ as this will have a backlash as you don’t actually know how they are feeling personally, everyone feels different.
- Support people as much as possible as they can become suicidal as they may feel life isn’t worth living anymore with the loved one they have just lost, they could become depressed, feel loneliness, and get panic attacks as they begin to wonder how they are going to manage without their loved one around anymore.
- Listening to people is one of the most important things you can do, take time and be with them and listen, this will help with the grieving process.
- Avoid telling people it’s time you got over this, as this can be the start of an argument and the end of friendship so then its two or more people grieving and for different reasons.
- Encourage the person to talk and if necessary, get out and about with you as a friend and support them, be there for them, you will become the rock for this person.
- Grieving can be a long process, some people can get over it quicker than others, some never get over it.
Sometimes people go to the extremes of wanting to move away from the area as it has too many memories. This can cause double grieving as they have suddenly lost all contact with close friends nearby. Don’t tell people it’s wrong, talk to them about the situation, explain that friends are not nearby any more. It’s not easy as they have friends where they are moving to, they could be just looking for a fresh start as being in the present area could be too traumatic for them. Moving to another area where the person going through bereavement hasn’t connected on a daily basis with friends with the loved one they have just lost, may be easier for them to get over the loss as it will not bring back so many memories.
Trying to help someone going through bereavement is a very difficult task as emotions can run extremely high. It’s a balancing act of talking and listening and being there for them, rather than saying how it should be. Saying how it should be is the worst thing you can say to someone going through bereavement. Listen, Help and Chat is the best policy.